Chapter 8
Let them eat cake.
As the week came to an abrupt halt, so did I... Walking home after going to the bottle shop to get supplies for mothers day I tripped and fell. This has been one of my greatest fears since the beginning of this journey. I landed straight on my knees (saving all 4 bottles of wine of course!), but bruised and skinned both knees, and My work pants didn’t come off too well either. While I was on the ground I felt the need to just sit there and giggle, a lot, then I realized where I was… In the middle of dockside, between two weddings. I quickly gathered myself and regrouped looking in all direction including above to the units to see if anyone had seen me. I dusted myself off and hobbled as quickly as I could to the safety of the boat. No one was there, Ashleigh and Dylan where spending the weekend with me but hadn’t arrived yet so I got changed and sat myself down on the couch until they arrived. Mothers day saw a deliciously baked High Tea on the boat for us two Mums courtesy of Brittany and Kahli. We sat there on deck eating delicate cupcakes, delicious finger sandwiches, tarts and loaf cake whilst sipping on bubbles all afternoon. Greg was still away so it was just the girls, something we hadn’t done in a long time. Dylan was off playing with one of the kids from a neighboring boat.
First day of the rest of my life
The day before surgery I pampered myself with a facial with Lil and a Chiro appointment with Misha. Then time to spend with Greg. I had a great night sleep strangely enough, I guess I must have been prepared for what was about to happen. With my bag packed we got to the hospital admissions desk just ahead of schedule. I was asked how many bags I’d like to check in, seriously, there was a dome top concierge trolley identical to those you would find at a Hilton, Mercure, or Sofitel! I was a little excited coz the experience made me feel like I was going on a holiday rather than a hospital stay. We were escorted to the “Welcome Lounge” where we had options ranging from TV to Internet, Magazines, even music or movies courtesy of the numerous ipods around the lounge to fill the time while we waited for the surgical admission, “gowning up”, and chat with the Anesthetist… A short wait would have been fine but two hours was almost unbearable and as prepared as I was that wait slightly unnerved me… Then it was time, time to get gowned up and by that I mean putting on the biggest, most hideous paper pants you can imagine, sexy pressure stockings, blue paper booties, and a rear tie gown. Greg and I were put in this little private waiting room (almost like the Qantas club only without the nibbles and drinks) and I was soon taken to my wheel chair and taken to theatre. I was encouraging the orderly to go faster and pop a few wheelies but he wouldn’t in fear that his boss would see him. As it was we nearly ran over my surgeon! After cracking a few jokes and just as I was saying “ today is going to the first day of the rest of my life” it was my turn to say good night…
When I woke up I felt relieved, clean, glad that it was all over. I didn’t get much sleep that night because the nursing staff where checking in on me every 2 hours. My dressing was taken off in the morning and up until that time I had felt no pain. Once the support of the surgical dressing was gone though, that changed… It wasn’t unbareable but I had a few panadol just in case it got worse. I was given my exercise program, taken for a walk with “Dolly” (my drip machine) and “Deirdre” (my drainage bag). I talked to the breast care nurse, and struck up some very valuable friendships with the nursing staff and the “hotel service staff”. I used my “I need a pig here” line as well as “off with my boob” which got the desired smiles from “My Team”. My purple pjs and wacky sox and slippers have been the centre of attention and the subject of plenty of conversations not to mention my paw print dressing gown. The team feed us every few hours… Probably to keep we natives from becoming restless, and to relieve the boredom! (Free Pay TV and the internet only entertain for so long!)
Dolly has been taken away, only leaving Deirdre but I can’t go home till she gets her tubes out of me… Finally my test results have come back and its all good news! Dr. Chris was very pleased with how it all went. The tumors came away easily, he took only 13 lymph nodes and from these only 3 had been affected by the cancer. Even better news was that the 3 affected nodes were all within the breast itself! My boob weighed in at a healthy 1100grams, and contained the tumors totally. The final positive was that despite there being 2 large tumors in the breast, there was a clean margin of at least 10mm in all directions… Thanks Lefty, you sacrificed yourself to give me my life back! Funny I never had any doubt that this was going to be the result and this makes me happy with my decision to change surgeons. The cancer is gone! So is 1100gms of boob but this is a small price to pay, and over a kilo I don’t have to change my diet by! It feels good to not have the worry anymore. From the pathology report it would seem that chemo had little or no effect on the tumors. This I’m not so sure about… I did notice a significate increase in size in 1 if not both tumors since I stopped chemo some 7 weeks earlier. Dr. Chris thinks that perhaps this extended break may have been responsible but in any case I still have a way to go with my treatment… No doubt Dr. Geoff will fill us in on this one and ensure that the “mopping up” is done effectively.
Matching set
I had another visit from the breast care nurse who brought lots of goodies. I love my little purple pillow from Zonta, my pink sox from Chicks in pink and my really strange, soft, trianglular shaped boob! She walked me through the whole mastectomy bra ordeal and yes, I’m sure you all know that this is a very big thing for me. I am after all a woman of “sets”, my bra and panties have to match no matter what… no exception… A set for every occasion… The nurse showed me some just passable bras and yes, they do have matching bottoms! I saw some very nice swimwear, and was walked through all the different prosthetic options and there uses… Did you know there is even a “Climate controlled prosthetic boob for use in cold climates!)… Somehow all this new information and the fact that enough women before me have put in the effort to pave the way for a continuation of my personal image has me feeling more at ease with the whole situation, and ready to take on the challenges that lie immediately ahead. Mind you, I don’t particularly like the flat chest look I see in the mirror, and because of the way I’m holding myself it looks like the other boob has given up the fight against gravity, but this is only temporary! Rest assured, soon as my body is ready I will be having that reconstruction which unfortunately involves a tummy tuck! Dam that. Lol.
Removal of a friend
Finally Dierdre’s tubes have been removed and I am given the all clear to go home. This in itself posed another problem. What on earth do I wear? Most of my tops are put on over the head or fitted, this is not an option in the short term. I need loose button through shirts. Thankfully it’s coming on to winter and the button through shirt is in fashion. (ya see, the world does know who I am!) Naturally our first stop was “The House of Target”. Go the Cami and shirt!... You know the look, just short of the “fully sick” bogan look of trackie daks, a mullet, and uggies. I of cause did not indulge in the trackie look. I do not do housewife. I’m sure next week when I’m a bit more flexible, and not quite so tender will be a different story.