Chapter 4
The right of passage.
Sméagol.
We decided to go for trip on the ferry to the city today. I wanted to give my head a rest from encounter so I decided to put a scarf on. I know, something I said I would never do. As I was putting my turban on Greg made the comment that my head looked like Sméagol, you know that adorable little creature out of Lord of the Rings. I thought this was kind of cool as I have always liked Sméagol and I am also drawn (as you all know) to “the precious”. This is a name that I am quite proud to be associated with and I think it will stick with me for quite some time. With my turban on and scarf firmly wound around my head we set off to the city. I was amazed at the reactions that I was getting from complete strangers. The sympathetic glances, the apologies, the people just giving me space and moving out of my way. I could really get used to this and milk it. By the end of the trip I was quite amused by it all. The older women seem to be the worst, they do the sideways glance, and you know the sneaky corner invisible look you think no one can see. Then as soon as they are found out they either tilt their head with a sooky look of awwww, or the quick, look away look away, oh my god she saw me looking.
God given right.
It’s Josh’s (Greg’s youngest son, MY son!) 18th birthday weekend. We have all been waiting years for this day. The day we can take Josh out on the town, drinking, legally. It’s just a shame that I can’t go at it full on like the plan has always been. After dinner on the Boat , complete with cake, we walked up to the story bridge hotel for the first round. We left Gabby (Greg’s last born, our youngest girl child), and Josh’s girlfriend Ash behind, (Yes I know we have too many Josh’s and Ash’s!), on the boat because they are too young to partay. As it is a fathers God given right, the same right that my father and I’m sure Greg’s father exercised, Greg bought Josh his first long awaited beer, not that it was his first beer ever but his first legal beer purchased by his father. Josh then in turn sauntered up to the bar and reciprocated. Many more beers, shots, shooters and drinks followed that night and Josh kept his head managing to get through the evening vertical, and with his dinner (and cake) intact! We have nearly completed the clubbing ritual, the right of passage of all our offspring drinking legally in the same bar. I recall with great pride all our kids showing the bouncer their ID, what a glorious sight. As I looked down from the stairs surveying the scene, How proud did I feel at this moment and wow, what a good looking crew we gave life to. Four more years before this scene is truly complete and I’m certain this time will fly. I finally got to meet Nick’s (Greg’s eldest son, our 1st boy child) girlfriend Ingrid. I had heard so much about her, all good I might add, however I had never laid eyes on her. I was starting to think that she had two heads and was being hidden from the world (or maybe just me), or she was a figment of everyone’s imagination… you know, an imaginary friend… Drop Dead Fred style. I was delighted, she is lovely, can we keep her? She fits in so well.
Rocking the Chi.
The last 2 weeks have been filled with visiting friends, massages and facials and of course work. I went to the Kim Walters Choices “look good feel better” workshop. I was curious as to how on earth I could feel any better than I already did and surly I looked good, my makeup was all in place and encounter all brushed and styled. When I arrived I was introduced to other women in various stages of their cancer journeys, most had already had surgery and had just started their chemo. We all sat down in front of a mirror with our own name on it. The mirrors were surrounded with makeup, lotions, potions and feel good products. I thought all my Christmas’s had come at once! This was all mine to take home! There were full size products from Chanel, L’Oreal, Maybelline, Dermalogica, Mary Kay, Estee Lauder, and Mac to name just a few. Even better, they were all in colours I like. All donated, all free! I was touched once again… the generosity of this foundation is overwhelming. I know where my donation dollars will be going. “Kim Walters Choices Foundation”, they are not government funded, they rely solely on public and corporate donations. All the volunteers showed us how to cleanse, tone, moisturise and apply all the products, even how to draw on eyebrows if they did the unthinkable and ran away! For those who were new to wigs, there were lots to play with. They went through how to look after them properly and even how to wear turbans, snoods and scarves. A very worthwhile few hours…
As always, right on time, my next chemo session is here... Nothing different about that… I didn’t make my usual visit to Dr. Geoff’s office because he was in a meeting so they scheduled me later, Funny I didn’t make that because I was still hooked up to my dolly filled with bags of Cytotoxic liquid. Dr Geoff though, being the type to never take anything for granted caught up with me as I sat in my big comfy chair. He stressed the need to see me in his rooms to discuss the next phase of my treatment. He was talking surgery. It’s funny how one little word can rock your chi. It’s a word that I had blocked from my brain and I guess in a way I was in denial about the whole surgery thing. While he is pleased with my progress, he is also anxious to start me on Herceptin, the wonder drug, and as we know that can only happen after surgery. We made an appointment with Professor Ian on the Thursday before my next treatment, three weeks away… that way I have a bit of time to try to get my head around my next monumental mile stone. I really don’t want to lose a boob, but I don’t want to live in fear of the little buggers spreading to somewhere else like my kidney, liver, bones or even brain! Any of these would be tragic and ya can’t remove ‘em! So there it is… I have 3 weeks to “suck it up sunshine” before the actual schedule is laid out in front of me… Time to get focused again…